by Steven Arness | Mar 25, 2024 | Thoughts
Has anyone seen the story about the pervert in the women’s restroom at Planet Fitness?
You know, they one where there was a trans woman shaving at the sink just like we expect, no, demand that women are to shave every hair off their body except what’s on their scalp?
As proof, a women in the same restroom took a picture of this man who identified as LGBTQ+ standing at the sink fully clothed as they were shaving.
Then this women, identified as Patricia Silva, was upset that her membership was cancelled for complaining about this when in all actuality it was cancelled for her violating gym policy by taking photos and/or videos in the locker room.
Then this pervert criticized Planet Fitness on social media saying they sided with the “pedo” instead of with her and the child that was in the locker room. You heard me right, she was the pervert, it’s not a term reserved just for men and fits her actions exactly.
So tell me, how many girls have seen their father shaving at home? How about boys seeing their mom shave? How many advertisements have we all seen of men and women shaving themselves in the media?
This trans woman was doing nothing that would put them into the pedophile category. How many stories are there of women using the men’s room, even with men in them! Women who do this are not seen as being pedophiles, instead they are seen as using the facilities without any kind of ulterior motive. Which is exactly what this trans women was doing! You say they were violating a women’s safe place, what if this was their safe place? What if they were abused in the men’s room? Did you ever think of that? And what IF they did something? Staff has all their information, one would have to be pretty dumb to do anything to anyone in such an environment.
I’ve watched fathers pawn off their daughters to complete strangers so they can get changed in the girls/women’s changing room. Yet a mother can come in with her son and walk right into the boy’s/men’s room without missing a step and not feeling any kind of guilt for doing so.
Such people weaponize children to further their agenda that men are evil around kids and should not be trusted. And we men sit and let it happen because that’s what we’ve been told during our entire existence that we are to be feared. In reality we should be fearing the people who fear them as they are the ones seeking to do harm.
Do you know why this is a problem? It’s because we as a society have such a strict definition of what a boy/man is. If you’re a girl/women, you can be anything you want to be, not so if you’re a man when everyone around you is saying you cannot do that unless you’re a female.
Boys/Men have been a minority before being a minority was a thing. Let that soak in and think of all the things that men don’t do for fear of being chided, ridiculed, scorned, and outcast for doing, using, or wearing something that society considers as “feminine”
I’m not saying that trans women would not exist if we allowed boys/men the same freedom as girls/women, as trans men do exist, but we don’t deny them the experience like we do for trans women. At least I don’t think we do as only men and trans women seem to make the news.
We have spent over a century de-segregating the humans in our society, but are still ignorant to the ways and forms we oppress males and how we handle those that we do not consider stereotypical. It is all segregation until there is no segregation.
Do better.
by Steven Arness | Oct 11, 2023 | Advocacy
HB183, Ohio’s House Bill which is titled “Regards single-sex bathroom access in schools, universities”
This bill can be found here, https://ohiohouse.gov/legislation/135/hb183
I had hoped to give my testimony in person at this committee meeting today, but I had a late night service ticket and didn’t make it home until the early morning. On top of that, today is also my 15 year anniversary with my Babette Erin Stewart-Arness (HI BABE!) and then I have an early job tomorrow. So sleep won out.
I don’t support, and mostly oppose this bill, why? For one, I can understand why people think this bill needs to exist. On the other hand, this bill, and other such bills, without intention I believe, are slowly whittling away men’s (boy’s) freedoms.
Below is my written testimony on this bill, and below that is my in-person testimony I was going to give.
H.B. 183 Ohio House Higher Education Committee 10-11-2023 submitted testimony drafted 10-10-2023
Steven Arness AKA Steven Arness
While it may not look like it, I stand before you as the epitome of microaggressions, bigotry, and discrimination, of which I will give you some of my personal experiences.
So lets ask the question, and while it may not sound serious to you, it is for me, as a heterosexual male, which restroom do I use?
Yes, I know, it is a rather silly question now isn’t it as looking at me right now you assuredly would say for me to use the men‘s restroom.
I ask because if me and my wife were to visit a place of public accommodations dressed in the same attire, I could be told to change clothes or leave.
In fact I was told to leave a place of public accommodations for dressing the same way as other females had the freedom to do. When I asked the Ohio Civil Rights Commission to look into this. The defendant blatantly admitted that I would not have been kicked out if I was a women. And while the commission did agree that I was discriminated against based on sex, they denied me conciliation and closed the case.
You see, sometimes I wear a skirt, yes, a heterosexual male wearing a skirt that a typical female might wear. I am not transgender, transvestite, gay, cross-dresser, child molester, pedophile, or mentally ill.
Civil rights organizations all speak of equality, but being a white heterosexual male has none of them standing behind or next to me. Those that you think would, like the ACLU, drop my concerns as some man wearing a skirt needs psychiatric help, not civil right help. Instead I have organizations and individuals that stand in front of me and block my path saying I do not have the same rights as women and they suffer no reproductions for doing so.
So which restroom do I use? The one with the skirted picture? Or the one that says men’s? Or as most people have been made to believe, should I say I’m transgender when I wear a skirt? If I use the men’s room while wearing a skirt, what kind of issues will that cause? The women’s? When my wife wears pants, should she be using he restroom depicting pants? What about women that use the men’s room at events due to the long lines for the women’s?
In my over 20 years of operating an amusement park, I interacted with thousands of kids and adults every year. And while I tried to stay gender neutral when I came across someone who was androgynes, sometimes I slipped, some where okay, others upset, but I never treated any of them with disrespect. Why don’t we have different restrooms for democrats and republicans? From the outside I think we can agree that they look the same.
What about a Tomboy, or a Janegirl? Is someone in authority going to put a label on their forehead and hand so that they/we can verify which restroom they are to use? It’s ludicrous to claim that transgender males are going into female restrooms and transgender females are going into male restrooms for nefarious purposes. They don’t want that kind of attention and they typically don’t want to be in there any longer then necessary.
I went to watch an ice skating competition, a little girl and I presume her dad entered and I watched as it took him two tries before he found a women to take his daughter into the girls locker room to get changed. A little while later I saw a mom show up with her son and they both walked straight into the men’s bathroom/boys changing room.
One day at learn to skate a little girl asked me to tie her skates, I told her no, she asked why, I said I couldn’t, she asked why not? After a few more back and forth’s, she finally left and sought help elsewhere, now I certainly could tie her skates. But I face enough repercussions for just wearing a skirt to not give ignorant people more ammunition. In hindsight It was wrong of those people to make me feel the way I did and I hope one day that little girl understood why I said no.
My wife certainly doesn’t claim to be transgender when wearing pants, and nobody cares when she does. Yet when I wear an unbifurcated garment, I’m escorted out of the building. Do you know what my wife’s solution is to my skirt wearing? To move outside the United States, can you believe that? In the land of the free she suggested that we move out of the country.
It doesn’t matter if this bill passes or not as it does not address the root of the problem. And the problem is not a girl that wants to be a boy that would need to use the boys restroom, or a boy that wants be a girl that would need to use the girls restroom.
The problem is that we are scared of men, and more so that we are ashamed of our own bodies. Nobody believes me when I tell them about the discrimination I have experienced, and when I elaborate, they tell me to just wear pants. Why? Do they tell people of color to change their skin tone to white? Do they tell females to change their sex?
And that’s what this bill, and some of the other bills are really about are they not? To suppress males from experiencing gender freedom as its all fine when we uplift women, yet turn around and squash males when they attempt the same. There is a saying that says, “Anyone can be anything they want to be” well, unless your male that is. We made all kinds of laws to bring females level with males, while being blind to the societal restrictions that we placed on them.
In 2003 US Figure Skating changed the singles rules on women’s attire in allowing them to wear trousers in competition. And then in 2021 they removed all attire based restrictions across all disciplines, males however are still required to wear full length trousers. Look at congress, even they can’t make unbiased clothing rules.
Why is it so hard to treat everyone equally as individuals instead of segregating them into pre-made biased boxes and restricting them from doing something that harms no-one?
I’m getting old, all I want to do is skate, and perhaps inspire others to express their own freedom. I shouldn’t have to choose which restroom to use based on what I’m wearing or how I feel. All I want to be is me, and I just need to tinkle.
H.B. 183 Ohio House Higher Education Committee 10-11-2023 proposed in-person testimony
Steven Arness AKA Steven Arness
(Revised 3:31pm October 10th 2023)
(Direct all talking to Chairman, refer to others if needed through Chairman.)
Chairman Mr. Merrin, Ranking Member Mr. Boyd and members of the Higher Education Committee, thank you for the opportunity to testify today on House Bill 183. My name is Steven Arness and I am here today to share with you my personal experiences and thoughts about this legislation.
While it may not look like it, I stand before you as the epitome of microaggressions, bigotry, and discrimination.
So lets ask the question, and while it may not sound serious to you, it is for me, as a heterosexual male, which restroom do I use?
Yes, I know, it is a rather silly question now isn’t it as looking at me right now you assuredly would say for me to use the men‘s restroom.
I ask because if me and my wife were to visit a place of public accommodations dressed in the same attire, I could be told to change clothes or leave.
In fact I was told to leave a place of public accommodations for dressing the same way as other females had the freedom to do. When I asked the Ohio Civil Rights Commission to look into this. The defendant blatantly admitted that I would not have been kicked out if I was a women. And while the commission did agree that I was discriminated against based on sex, they denied me conciliation and closed the case.
You see, sometimes I wear a skirt, yes, a heterosexual male wearing a skirt that a typical female might wear. (I didn’t wear a skirt today as I wasn’t sure if I would be turned away at the door.) I assure you that I am not transgender, transvestite, gay, cross-dresser, child molester, pedophile, or mentally ill.
Civil rights organizations all speak of equality, but being a white heterosexual male has none of them standing behind or next to me. Those that you think would, drop my case as they think some man wearing a skirt needs psychiatric help, not civil rights help. Instead I have organizations and individuals that stand in front of me and block my path saying I do not have the same rights as women and they suffer no repercussions for doing so.
Omit for time (So which restroom do I use? The one with the skirted picture? Or the one that says men’s? Or as most people have been made to believe, should I say I’m transgender when I wear a skirt? If I use the men’s room while wearing a skirt, what kind of issues will that cause? The women’s? When my wife wears pants, should she be using he restroom depicting pants? What about women that use the men’s room at events due to the long lines for the women’s?)
Omit for time (In my over 20 years of operating an amusement park, I interacted with thousands of kids and adults every year. And while I tried to stay gender neutral when I came across someone who was androgynes, sometimes I slipped, some where okay, others upset, but I never treated any of them with disrespect. Why don’t we have different restrooms for democrats and republicans? From the outside I think we can agree that they look the same.)
What about a Tomboy, or a Janegirl? Or someone who is androgynous? Is someone in authority going to put a label on their forehead and hand so that they/we can verify which restroom they are to use? It’s ludicrous to claim that transgender males are going into female restrooms and transgender females are going into male restrooms for nefarious purposes. They don’t want that kind of attention and they typically don’t want to be in there any longer then necessary.
I went to watch an ice skating competition, a little girl and I presume her dad entered and I watched as it took him two tries before he found a women to take his daughter into the girls locker room to get changed. A little while later I saw a mom show up with her son and they both walked straight into the men’s bathroom/boys changing room.
One day at learn to skate a little girl asked me to tie her skates, I told her no, she asked why, I said I couldn’t, she asked why not? After a few more back and forth’s, she finally left and sought help elsewhere, now I certainly could tie her skates. But I face enough repercussions for just wearing a skirt to not give ignorant people more ammunition. In hindsight It was wrong of those people to make me feel the way I did and I hope one day that little girl understands (understood) why I said no.
(Others have told me that organizations such as Shaker Heights figure skating club enacted sexist dress codes to keep me from participating.)
My wife certainly doesn’t claim to be transgender when wearing pants, and nobody cares when she does. Yet when I wear an unbifurcated garment, I’m escorted out of the building. Do you know what my wife’s solution is to my skirt wearing? To move outside the United States, can you believe that? In the land of the free she suggested that we move out of the country. (Look around you, how many men are dressed the same compared to women.)
It doesn’t matter if this bill passes or not as it does not address the root of the problem. And the problem is not a girl that wants to be a boy that would need to use the boys restroom, or a boy that wants be a girl that would need to use the girls restroom.
The problem is that we are scared of men, and more so that we are ashamed of our own bodies.
Omit for time (Nobody believes me when I tell them about the discrimination I have experienced, and when I elaborate, they tell me to just wear pants. Why? Do they tell people of color to change their skin tone to white? Do they tell females to change their sex?)
And that’s what this bill, and some of the other bills are really about are they not? To suppress males from experiencing gender freedom as its all fine when we uplift women, yet turn around and squash males when they attempt the same. There is a saying that says, “Anyone can be anything they want to be” well, unless your male that is. We made all kinds of laws to bring females level with males, while being blind to the societal restrictions that we placed on them (men.)
In 2003 US Figure Skating changed the singles rules on women’s attire in allowing them to wear trousers in competition. And then in 2021 they removed all attire based restrictions across all disciplines, males however are still required to wear full length trousers. Look at congress, even they can’t make unbiased clothing rules.
Why is it so hard to treat everyone equally as individuals instead of segregating them into pre-made biased boxes and restricting them from doing something that harms no-one? (Why can’t we have unisex restrooms? What can’t we teach instead of preaching? What does one do out in the world where a sexless bathroom may not be available? Males get assaulted too, what about them? Why are we peaching instead of teaching? Segregation does more harm then good.)
I don’t think we need laws to protect white heterosexual males, but then again, maybe we do as they have been an unrecognized minority for far too long and even so called privilege hasn’t overcome that.
(It’s so easy to divide by sex when we fail to teach isn’t it?)
I’m getting old, all I want to do is skate, and perhaps inspire others to express their own freedom. I shouldn’t have to choose which restroom to use based on what I’m wearing or how I feel. All I want to be is me, and I just need to tinkle.
If you have any questions or need any clarifications of my experiences, please ask.
answer with “Chairman Mr. Merrin, to Representative xxxx, the answer is____.”
Thank You
by Steven Arness | Apr 19, 2023 | Articles
Over the years, rules about figure skating attire has changed with the times (and some scandal’s), with one exception, men’s.
Unfortunately I do not have how the rules read for each year, perhaps others can help fill in the holes.
International Skating Union (ISU)
2018
I. 3. The requirements to clothing of the skaters were changed as follows:
“The clothing must not give the effect of excessive nudity for athletic sports. Men must wear trousers; no tights are permitted. Accessories and props are not permitted.” Ladies in Singles and
Pairs may wear skirts, trousers or tights.
2020
Based on ISU Rule 501(1), competitors should note the following regarding appropriate clothing.
Clothing and any make-up of the competitors must be modest, dignified and appropriate for athletic competition – not garish or theatrical in design. Clothing may, however, reflect the character of the music chosen. The clothing must not give the effect of excessive nudity inappropriate for the discipline. Men must wear full-length trousers. (no mention of ladies attire)
US Figure Skating
2003
SSR 19.02 Clothing for men cannot be theatrical in nature. Men must wear full-length trousers. Tights are not permitted. The clothing must have a neckline which does not expose the chest, must not be sleeveless and must be without excessive decoration such as beads, sequins and the like.
SSR 19.03 Clothing for ladies cannot be theatrical in nature. They must have skirts and pants covering the hips and posterior. The lady’s dress must not give the effect of excessive nudity inappropriate for an athletic sport. A unitard is not acceptable. A bare midriff is not acceptable. Clothing must be without excessive decoration such as beads, sequins, feathers and the like.
Somewhere in 201x the skirt only restriction in Pairs and Synchronized was removed.
2016
4033 Singles Men must wear trousers; no tights for men are permitted. Ladies may wear skirts, trousers and tights (including unitards).
5033 Pairs Men must wear trousers; no tights for men are permitted. Ladies may wear skirts, trousers and tights (including unitards).
6021 Dance D. Ladies must wear a skirt. The skirt must go around her entire waist; however, there may be slits in the skirt on one or both sides up to the waist.
7021 Synchronized B. Ladies may wear a skirt or body suit or full length trousers. C. Men must wear full-length trousers; no tights are permitted.
2019
6033 Singles Men must wear full-length trousers. Ladies may wear skirts, trousers and tights (including unitards).
7033 Men must wear full-length trousers. Ladies may wear skirts, trousers and tights (including unitards).
8021 C. Men must wear full-length trousers. D. Ladies must wear a skirt.
8022 Not withstanding the above, adult ladies competing in any adult competition or testing any pattern dance test or free dance test may wear trousers if they so choose.
9021 B. Ladies may wear a skirt or body suit or full-length trousers. C. Men must wear full-length trousers; no tights are permitted.
2021
6033 Singles Men must wear full-length trousers. (Restrictions on Ladies attire removed)
7033 Pairs Men must wear full-length trousers. (Restrictions on Ladies attire removed)
8021 Ice Dance C. Men must wear full-length trousers. D. Ladies must wear a skirt, except for the 2020-21 rhythm dance, for which the lady may wear trousers.
8022 Not withstanding the above, adult ladies competing in any adult competition or testing any pattern dance test or free dance test may wear trousers if they so choose.
9021 Synchronized Skating B. Men must wear full-length trousers; no tights are permitted. (Restrictions on Ladies attire removed)
So if your a man who wants to wear a skirt to express yourself, be a women, ladies, do as you please.
#figureskating #iceskating #usfigureskating #isu #clothing #gender #trousers #skirts #dresses #male
by Steven Arness | Jul 1, 2022 | Advocacy
Back on May 24th 2022 I contacted Kadari Taylor-Watson, Director of the Diversity, Equity and Inclusion working group of US Figure Skating by email and also left a voicemail.
After a couple of weeks not hearing anything, I re-sent my email on June 23rd and also called again, and left another voicemail.
It’s been another week and still no reply.
Back in 2020, US Figure Skating was working on starting the Diversity, Equity and Inclusion working group, of which I applied to. Unfortunately I received a reply in July of 2020 that I did not qualify to be included in the group. In fact, even though I was told my contact information would be kept for future contact regarding my experiences, I never was.
Looking at US Figure Skating’s Diversity, Equity and Inclusion working group page, it seems their main focus is on Black, Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) and not anyone else who may be marginalized for being a figure skater.
Why have a Diversity, Equity and Inclusion Working Group when it’s mission statement does not line up with it’s title?
Diversity noun
di·ver·si·ty | \ də-ˈvər-sə-tē , dī- \
plural diversities
Definition of diversity
1: the condition of having or being composed of differing elements : VARIETY
especially : the inclusion of people of different races (see RACE entry 1 sense 1a), cultures, etc. in a group or organization
programs intended to promote diversity in schools
2: an instance of being composed of differing elements or qualities : an instance of being diverse
a diversity of opinion
equity noun
eq·ui·ty | \ ˈe-kwə-tē \
plural equities
Definition of equity
1a: justice according to natural law or right
specifically : freedom from bias or favoritism
b: something that is equitable
2a: the money value of a property or of an interest in a property in excess of claims or liens against it
b: the common stock of a corporation
c: a risk interest or ownership right in property
d: a right, claim, or interest existing or valid in equity
3a: a system of law originating in the English chancery and comprising a settled and formal body of legal and procedural rules and doctrines that supplement, aid, or override common and statute law and are designed to protect rights and enforce duties fixed by substantive law
b: trial or remedial justice under or by the rules and doctrines of equity
c: a body of legal doctrines and rules developed to enlarge, supplement, or override a narrow rigid system of law
in·clu·sion | \ in-ˈklü-zhən \
Definition of inclusion
1: the act of including : the state of being included
2: something that is included: such as
a: a gaseous, liquid, or solid foreign body enclosed in a mass (as of a mineral)
b: a passive usually temporary product of cell activity (such as a starch grain) within the cytoplasm or nucleus
3: the act or practice of including students with disabilities with the general student population
Change the name, or change the mission statement, because right now, neither one fits!
